I can’t wait!

Posted: September 29, 2009 in Uncategorized

I just saw the news today, and I have to tell you (someone, anyone), how excited I am. On November 17th, the Sarah Palin memoir is coming out! Gosh, I think I need new shorts I’m so excited. The title of the book is aptly called, Going Rogue. Wow. What a fitting title.

I’m hoping that as part of the Going Rogue experience, Sarah will tell us what it was like to be a beauty queen. Perhaps she can enlighten us on what it is like to be an elitist. I bet she talks about what it was like to ruin one man’s bid for the presidency, and what it’s like to quit your job and leave a bunch of unfinished business. Or maybe she can regale us with stories about what it’s like to be a “hockey mom,” which for those of you that don’t know, is just like a soccer mom except 50 times more lame. But what I am really, REALLY hoping she talks about is what it is like to spit out lots of babies, have a cavernous vagina, and what it was like to fake an entire pregnancy in order to protect her busty daughter that can’t seem to keep her legs closed (truth be told, with boobies like that, I’d let ’em line up too).

I wonder when I can get in line to buy what is sure to be the most compelling piece of literature of any century ever? Is it too soon to get in line now? I wonder if she’ll do a book signing tour? If she does, I’m going to have her sign my balls.

As for that VP talk all the time, I’ll tell you, I still can’t answer that question until somebody answers for me what is it exactly that the VP does every day?
–Sarah Palin

jbr

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